Freedom in Love
by Confessed4Life
Summary: In a short unplanned time of play, Richard and Kahlan lose themselves in a moment of passion that leads to horrific consequences that could destroy one or both of them.
1. Chapter 1

The sun shined brightly down upon them, drying their river, soaked bodies as they lay against the bank, laughing. Lifting her arm, she pulled the arm of her dress out of the water, the weight of it bringing it to the ground hard. She turned her head and looked at him, his chest heaved with his laughter and rugged breaths. "It's going to take us all morning to dry ourselves."

"It was worth it," he told her as he rolled onto his side to face her. "I told you the water was warm."

She grinned, at last catching her breath. "I believed you before you pulled me in." Crawling over to her, he looked down and shook his head, the water falling off and hitting her in the face as she lifted her hands and tried to stop it. "Richard! Stop!" Rolling out from under him, Kahlan struggled against the wet fabric of her dress to stand and push him down into the dirt. He caught her as she fell back to the ground, her dress twisting tightly around her legs. "We should find a way to get dry. Cara and Zedd will wonder what happened."

"They don't need to know." He smiled widely as he remembered what had happened moments ago, before they returned to the safety of land.

It started innocently. Kahlan had reached out her arm, offering to help him out of the water, when he had pulled her in with him. After a few moments of shock, she had pushed his head under and then began their games. For the first time since beginning the quest, they let go. They allowed themselves to enjoy the others company without fear and questions. For a short amount of time, they forgot about everything else.

Before long, he had his arms wrapped around her, holding her to him as she splashed water at him. Their lips touched, for only a few seconds before they clung to each other in passion. She held him tightly, losing herself in their kiss until she remembered what she was. She ended the kiss before he liked, but continued to stay in his arms, surprising him. If Cara and Zedd knew, they would never be left alone together again.

"I won't tell them," Kahlan said softly, sitting up and wringing out a part of her dress. "I don't want one of them staying with us when they don't have to."

He smiled, knowing her meaning without her needing to say it. She liked being alone with him. "We don't have to meet them until it gets dark, we can always get back into the water."

She laughed, forgetting the cloth in her hands as she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around her knees. "I think they will notice if we are soaking wet when they find us."

"We don't need clothes to swim," he said quietly, a part of him hoping that she didn't object. "We don't have to touch."

Shaking her head slowly, Kahlan sighed. "No, but I'll want to." He was surprised by her honesty. Most of the time she would have changed the subject, but she didn't. Her cheeks red so he knew what she wasn't saying. "We should move over there, out of the shade. It will help our clothes to dry."

Standing up, he stepped to her with a smile. "All right, I'll start a fire as well. We should eat something if we are going to be lying in the sun." Reaching out, he offered her his hand to help her up.

She took it without hesitation, "Thank you."

He grinned, "The first time I offered you my hand, you pushed a blade to my throat."

"No one had ever done that before."

He kissed her, unexpectedly, pulling her against him as he wrapped her in his arms. She returned his kiss in full, her own arms hooking around his back and shoulders as she leaned into him. The dampness of their clothes made their bodies shake with cold as the wind began to flow past them. His first instinct as he felt her shake in his arms was to remove her clothes and press his body against hers for warmth, but he knew that he couldn't do that. Pulling back, he took one of her hands and grinned widely. "Come on."

He reconnected their lips once they were in the sun, but not as before. This time, it was quick and her body was so far away from his, they strained to touch before he turned away. She watched him for a few moments, shocked and confused as he pulled his wet shirt over his head and flattened it on one of the surrounding rocks. She wasn't ready for their kiss to end. Her body burned for his and the sight of him, standing shirtless before her, made her body grow even hotter. Without thought, she took a step toward him and grabbed his arm, turning him around. Her hands ran over his chest, touching him the way she had imagined for a long time.

He didn't stop her as she traced her fingers over him, her eyes watching as his muscles flexed against her touch. She had touched his chest, but never like this. Before, she had only been trying to stop the bleeding of a wound or when she grew curious of the Keeper's Mark, but this time, she touched him for her own desires. She could feel his heart beat beneath her touch; it was as rapid as her own as she looked up to his face. He pulled her to him, kissing her as he worked at the laces of her dress. He thought that she would stop him, that she would pull away, but she didn't and he was glad.

Her dress fell to the ground and he pulled her against him, expecting to feel her flesh. Disappointed by the feel of her corset, he instantly began trying to remove it, his fingers fumbling with the lacing. She held his face to hers, unwilling to break their kiss. The damp laces stuck to his fingers, making it more difficult to remove the clothing as his body was unable to hide its desire for her. She reached down and pushed her hand against him, surprising him almost as much as the moan that came from deep within her. Breaking their kiss, Richard gasped her name as he ripped a small portion of her corset.

Lowering her, gently to the ground, he tossed her corset a few feet away from them and instantly brought his lips to her chest. Pulling at his hair, Kahlan pushed her chest up and into his lips as she panted. His right hand moved over her, moving lower and lower until he reached the core of her and she nearly screamed in passion. Moving his hand, he groaned at the feeling, her readiness. Bringing his mouth back to hers, he pushed his tongue past her lips as he quickly pulled at the strings of his pants. His body ached with desire as she held him against her, gasping for air between their heated kisses.

Her head fell back with a loud cry as he entered her. He paused instantly and pulled back, his heart pounding in fear that his action would destroy everything between them. Looking to her face, he waited for her reaction. Her face was peaceful until she opened her eyes and then he saw it, the same fear that he had within him. Pressing his lips to hers lightly, Richard lifted his chest from hers. Just as he was about to roll off of her, she grabbed him and held him to her as she shifted herself beneath him. Her movements, took her breath from her lungs, he nails digging into his side as she tried to hold still.

"Just once," she whispered softly.

"Kahlan, I don't want to do something that you don't-"

Meeting his eyes, she swallowed the fear within her. "Only once."

He nodded and shifted his weight above her, resting himself upon his forearms at her side. He waited a moment, making sure that she had the chance to change her mind. He never wanted to hurt her and he knew that if he did what she was requesting and she changed her mind, it would destroy her. Slowly, her nails began to slide down his skin, a light stream of blood following as she begged for him silently. Slowly, he lifted himself from her and then pushed down quickly, drawing a loud cry from her lips that matched his own as she pulled his face to hers. Their cries became muffled by their lips as they tangled together, her legs wrapping around him to keep him from moving.

After a few moments, she reached between them and touched him, bringing his eyes to widen as she struggled to touch more of him. She kept her eyes closed, unable to look at him while she stroked him. He spoke her name softly, his voice shaking as he tried to calm himself. He knew what she wanted, what they both wanted, but he wasn't sure if it was the right thing. Kahlan moaned as his head fell to her chest, his breath warming her as he came undone. With one hand, he cupped her breast tightly, wanting to give her something as he spilled within her.

She held him to her, her heart pounding with the knowledge of what they may have just done. Richard smiled, despite himself, a part of him thrilled to think they may have just created a child. He wanted nothing more than to have a child with her, to be a family, but he knew that she would never have risked his life for it. A soft moan of displeasure left both of their lips as he shifted his body, pulling himself from her warmth. She opened her eyes as he lifted his head from her chest, wondering what he was thinking. She would give anything to know what was going through his mind. It terrified her to be in the dark.

"We can't tell Zedd," she said quickly, wanting someone to say something.

"What if we just- Kahlan, if you could be carrying my child, I think that we should tell them. We could protect-"

Shaking her head, she touched the side of his face, her thumb stoking over his cheek. "No, please don't. If he was to find out what we have done- A Confessor who carries a child is ordered to return to the Confessor's Palace until she gives birth. It is the only way to ensure safety, but I can't leave you. Richard, you need me with you."

"I won't let him send you back, but you will need to be protected-"

"We don't even know if we- It is my job to protect you."

He smiled, laid his hand over hers and pulled it from his face so that he could hold it. "We protect each other. I will not tell Zedd until you agree to it, but Kahlan, promise me that you will think about it." The moment she nodded in agreement, he began to roll off of her for the second time and once again, she stopped him. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she said in a whisper. "It's warm like this."

"I may crush you."

She shook her head; a smile playing with her lips as he gently ran one of his hands down her arm, providing instant warmth. "I'll risk it."

"But I won't." Rolling onto his side, he pulled her into his arms, her chest pressed firmly against his as he ignored the piercing rock that stabbed into his side.

After a few moments, she laughed and pulled back, taking him with her. "How long were you going to lie there with it poking you?"

"How did you-"

"I saw it when we walked over here. I thought that you missed it, but then I could feel..." She lifted her arm, his blood now staining a small portion below the elbow. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I didn't want to let go of you," he answered honestly as she moved over and helped him lay onto his back.

"Here, I'll stop the bleeding."

"It's not necessary. It's not deep."

Smiling, she ripped the bottom of her dress and folded it before smoothing it over the small wound. "We can't allow it to get infected."

"Zedd will heal it when we meet them. You don't have to do..." His words trailed off as she laid one of her hands on his chest as she pushed against the fabric. Her actions had the desired effect; he didn't feel the pain of the cloth. "Care for a swim?" he teased softly as she pulled back. She suddenly realized that she sat before him completely naked. Pulling her dress up to her chest, she felt her cheeks grow red as he watched her. "You don't have to do that," he said quietly.

"What?"

"Cover yourself, embarrassed. You're beautiful."

Looking from her hands to his eyes, she gave him a small smile and sighed. "Our clothes are nearly dry."

Sitting up, he laid his hand gently on her arm. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"I know. It's just- No one has ever said that to me before."

He ginned playfully. "How many other men have you been naked with?"

"None, but that's not... If I had, they wouldn't have said it. They wouldn't dare."

"Why not?"

Looking away from his eyes, she tightened her hold on her dress. "The fear that I would take them."

"I don't have that fear, Kahlan," he told her quickly. He didn't want to give her a moment to believe that he did.

She nodded and looked back to him. "I know. That's what scares me."

"Why?"

Forgetting that she was holding her dress to her, she dropped her hands into her lap in defeat. "If you're not scared, you'll... You'll do what we just did and I'm going to confess you."

Smiling, he moved in close to her and took her hands in his. "We just did that and you didn't confess me."

"Richard, we didn't... That's why I didn't confess you."

He laughed, "Kahlan, what we just did, it may not have been like other people, but we did make love."

"Made love?"

"Yes. I know that some people don't understand the difference, but I know that you do. You felt it, before when we were together, it was amazing but not because we were... It was amazing because for a while, we were able to show each other how much we love each other."

"Our clothes are dry enough. We should dress and get moving. If we hurry, we can get to the meeting place before them."

Sighing, Richard released her hands and leaned back. "All right, but I'm going to catch us something to eat first."

"You did what?" Cara asked as she pushed him back into a thin tree. "You decided to risk everything so that you could deflower the Mother Confessor?"

"I didn't risk anything. She didn't release her-"

"But you did. You pushed into her and released everything. Do you have any idea what you've done?"

"I made love to the woman that I love. I did nothing wrong!" He was angry. How could she think that he shouldn't have been with Kahlan? That could never be a mistake.

"If she is carrying a child, you lose her. The wizard will send her back and you will go with her. You will go and the Keeper will win."

"He won't send her away. I won't let him."

The blonde laughed, "You think that she will be able keep up with us? And after she has the child, what then?"

"We don't even know if she conceived a child. There is no need to worry about what might happen."

Stepping closer to him, Cara lowered her voice. "You may want to think about it. Confessors are very fertile. If she carries your child, she leaves."

He watched her walk away, his mind spinning and his heart pounding as he began to worry that they would be separated. Turning around he pushed through a few low hanging limbs and headed off into the darkness to think. He wondered how Cara could have known what they had done and if she knew, did Zedd?

He heard her coming, her footsteps coming quickly as she moved expertly through the trees. "Are you all right?"

Looking over his shoulder, he met her eyes. "I'm fine."

"Richard-"

"You have barely spoken to me in the past two days. Cara noticed something was different. She knows what happened."

"You told her?"

"I had to. I needed to talk to someone about it."

Walking slowly to him, she sat down beside him and looked out. "I'm sorry. I couldn't bring myself to talk about it. Not after what you called it."

"Because I said we made love?"

Nodding she leaned forward, resting her forearms on her legs. "You said it and I couldn't stop thinking about how much you lost because of it."

"What do you mean?"

"You called it making love when you- It was nothing. You could have had so much more with- anyone else."

"No, I couldn't," he said simply. "Kahlan, we made love and it was- I could not have had anything more or better with anyone else. There is no better."

Looking over to him, she blinked out the tears that had begun to fill her eyes. "When you were with... Before we met and you were able to be with her completely. You made love to her in ways you could never with me."

He smiled, surprising himself as well as her as he laid one of his hands on her shoulder. "I have never made love before. When I was with Anna, I was a child. I didn't know what I was doing, what it should have been like, but I do know that what we did- What you and I did, that was how it's meant to be."

Turning to face him, Kahlan took in a deep breath. "When you were with her, the- the pleasures that you would have experienced, the release, the content-"

Pressing his lips to hers, he stopped her from talking, from thinking about him with another woman. She no longer existed in his mind, she hadn't for many years. He had thought of no one until he met Kahlan. She filled his mind at all times. He had feared that she would pull away, that she would become upset, but she didn't. Her arms wrapped around his neck, holding him to her as he pushed against her, moving her slowly to her back. The angle was strange, almost painful for them both as her back came closer to the fallen tree.

He couldn't imagine kissing anyone else, the feel of her lips against his was enough to get him through anything. She pushed up against him, a soft moan of wanting leaving her throat as she tried to keep her desire from growing. He touched her as he had done before, clutching her breasts as he kissed over her neck. Trying to get closer, he lifted her from the bark, sending them both to the ground with a heavy thump. She climbed over him, sitting above him as their lips danced together fiercely. Her fingers wrapped themselves around his hair, pulling him closer as he pushed into her chest.

Leaning forward, she pushed him onto his back and pulled her hands from his body, kissing him deeply one last time. "We should go back. Zedd will start to worry we do not return soon."

"Just a moment longer," he whispered, pulling her down into his arms for a hug. "He must be eating by now. He will never notice if we are late."

"If I am pregnant, I will not stay. There is too much at risk. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. If I am, it will change everything."

Tightening his hold on her, he closed his eyes. "It doesn't change anything. You don't have to leave; we can get through it together."

Shaking her head, she tried to pull out of his arms, their connection making it more difficult to keep her mind made up. "If I am pregnant, I won't be able to stay. I won't be able to travel like this. I will need to leave."

"I don't want you to leave. I can't do this without you; I don't want to do it without you. If you leave, I will go with you."


	2. Chapter 2

Blood splattered onto her face as her dagger cut across the throat of her enemy, the baneling falling to the ground at her feet. Looking up, she quickly searched the area, making sure that her friends were safe as she began to fight another. She could hear Richard grunt in anger as he pushed the sword through his opponent before spinning around to the next. The sound of Cara's agiels echoed through the air, drowning out the other sounds except for her breathing. The smell of burning flesh filled her nose as Zedd set his enemy into a fiery blaze, them men screaming in pain as they raced off trying to put themselves out. She felt sick; the world began to spin as someone wrapped their arms around her and lifted her from the ground. She couldn't control it, the surge building up within her, screaming to be free. Opening her eyes, she saw them all; they stared at her, confused and in fear.

She felt the warmth splash upon her, soaking her as she fell to the ground. Opening her eyes, she saw them running to her. Richard fell to his knees beside her, pulling her body into his arms as Cara and Zedd stayed a few paces away from her, afraid. They were each covered in blood, the ground now covered in dead banelings.

"Are you all right?"

His voice startled her, making her jump and crawl out of his arms. "What happened?"

"You killed them. You killed them all, Kahlan. How did you-"

Stepping forward, Zedd stared down at her. "She didn't," he said softly, his voice filled with disappointment. "How long have you been carrying the child?"

"Just over a month."

Richard looked at her in shock, she hadn't told him. "What? Why didn't you say anything?"

Pushing him away, he let loose her tears. "You told me not to. You told me to wait until I could no longer."

"No," he whispered softly bringing her back into his arms and wiping the blood that came from her nose. "Kahlan, we were to tell him together."

"What have you two done?" Zedd asked as he lifted Richard up by the shirt, making her fall to the ground with a light thump. "How could you have been so foolish?"

"Foolish?" Richard shouted, pushing his grandfather away from him. "It is not foolish to be with the woman that I love!"

The wizard gave a small smile as he returned to his place beside Kahlan. "How were you able-?"

"I didn't confess him," Kahlan answered softly. "I could never."

Kneeling down beside them, Zedd nodded knowingly. "I know, dear one. Here, lay back. I will check on the child."

"She's fine. I can feel her." Closing her eyes, she took in a deep breath. "She's so strong."

"It is not only your Confessor's magic that she carries, but also that of a Rahl. Richard's blood flows through her." Bringing his eyes to hers, he raised his eyebrows, insisting that she listen to him. "Carrying this child may kill you."

She nodded, "I know."

Confused, Richard grabbed her face and made her look at him. "What? Why?"

"The amount of power one can hold, it's different with everyone. I do not believe that it will kill me. She has already protected me, more than once."

"You have used the child's magic before this day?" Zedd asked quietly. She nodded slowly, looking from Richard to him. "When?"

"I'm not sure, maybe a few weeks ago. When we were first attacked by the mountain wall. We had all been separated and she saved me."

"How?"

She returned her eyes to Richard and frowned. "I didn't even know they were surrounding me. I couldn't see them, but somehow I- One moment I was waiting for them to kill me and the next, they were screaming and falling to their knees, covered in blood."

Bringing his face to hers, he lowered his voice to a whisper. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because I didn't want to worry you. If I told you, you would never leave my side. You wouldn't be able to do what needed to be done."

"What if you needed someone? Kahlan, you both could have been hurt!" She jumped as he raised his voice. He had never yelled at her before. Pressing his forehead to hers, he closed his eyes and took in several deep breaths before continuing. "Spirits Kahlan, if I lost you..." He rubbed her cheeks with his thumbs, a smile coming to his lips as he pulled back to look at her and then to Zedd. "Make sure they're both all right. Cara and I will make sure that we're alone." He kissed her quickly and stood up, grinning down at her as he walked backward with Cara toward the surrounding trees. "We'll be right back."

The moment they were out of sight, Zedd looked at her, disappointed. "Why didn't you tell him?"

Lying back, Kahlan closed her eyes, hiding herself from him. "I was going to leave before he found out."

"Why?"

"I can't do this. I can't be with him the way that he wants."

He laughed lightly, bringing her sad eyes to his. "You are carrying his child. I believe you have already been with him in the way that you both wanted."

"It wasn't like that," she said to defend herself. "Zedd, it wasn't like that."

"I know child," he told her tenderly as he helped her to stand, "You cannot leave him."

Looking away from him, she shook her head. "I have to. If I were to stay, he wouldn't be able to focus. We need the Seeker to find the Stone of Tears and not worry about us."

Nodding, Zedd frowned. "And he needs the mother of his child with him. If you leave, you will unleash his madness. Without you here, if he is unable to protect you, it will destroy him from within and he will never find the stone."

"But if I stay and something happens- I can't lose this child, Zedd. It's a part of us."

"Staying with Richard is the only way to remain safe. He will allow no harm to come to you."

She nodded, growing frustrated as she began to pace before him. "I know. He would give his life, but I- I don't want him to risk his own life for mine."

"He already does. Every decision he has made has been what he believed would keep you the safest. If you stay or if you go, he will give his life to save yours. It is who he is."

Tears had once again filled her eyes as she tried to think of something, of anything that would keep them both safe, but she could think of one. "If I stay, he will believe that there is hope for us. There is none."

Laying a thin hand on her shoulder, he slowed her to a stop. "It wasn't long ago; you believed that you would never have his child." A smile came to his lips, "Yet, you carry it now. I have come to believe that when it comes to the two of you, if there is a way, you will find it. Nothing can stop you from trying."

"I don't want to be with him, Zedd." Her words stunned him, freezing him in place as she stepped out of his reach. "If I am with him," she began to cry, unable to hold back her feelings, her desires and her fears. "I will only continue hurt him. If I stayed and we forgot for a moment and- My magic will destroy him and I couldn't live with myself. We were able to conceive this child, but that was luck. He believes we made love and we didn't. What if the next time, I don't remember how much of a monster I am and I destroy him? What will happen then?"

"I cannot tell you what to do. There is nothing I can say that will make this any easier on either of you. This is a hard position that you have jumped into. You are afraid that your magic will destroy him, but you will destroy him by leaving. There is no right here. You have a decision to make; you should speak to him about it."

"I can't- I will not stay with Richard. If I leave now, he can find the stone; he can move on. Maybe he will find someone, someone who can be the woman he needs; a woman he more than deserves. Zedd, Richard could be happy with someone. He could have the family, the quiet, peaceful life that he has always wanted. He can't have anything with me." Tears were streaming down her face, even as her words remained calm. "I am nothing and I love him too much to allow him to waste his life caring for me."

"You don't mean that," The wizard told her as he stepped in close and took her hands in his. "You love him too much."

"That's why I am doing it. I love Richard, but it's not enough. I'm going to leave tonight after he sleeps."

"How could you let her go?" Richard shouted, stuffing his blanket into his travel bag. "You should have told me!"

"What would you have done, tied her to the tree? She wanted to leave and there would have been no stopping her."

"She's not safe out there!"

Zedd reached out, handing his grandson a folded piece of paper. "She asked me to give you this."

He snatched the paper from his grandfather's hand and walked into the trees to read. He knew that nothing she wrote would stop him from going after her. He was not going to give up on her that easily. Her handwriting was beautiful, elegant in a way that he could never describe. As he stared at the words, his heart began to pound as they began to sink into his mind. She had chosen her words well, hiding meaning and love beneath the darkness of the letters.

_Dearest Richard,_

_I need you to know that this was not an easy decision. I fear that by remaining at your side, I will become a distraction and you will be unable to focus on the important task in your hands. Do not believe that I do not love you. I do and that is why I must return to Aydindril. And I know you; you are packing your things in the hope that you will be able to stop me, so I ask you not to. We will never be able to have what we both want and this task is far greater than anything. You are the only one who can save us. _

_This child, our child, will be protected in every way available. I will not allow anything to happen to her. I will keep her safe the way you have always kept me safe. I ask the good spirits to protect you, to keep you safe as you continue on. I also ask that you try to find happiness, true life along your journey. You deserve someone who can be there for you. Someone who can love you the way that you should be. I will never be able to love you the way you deserve and for that, I am truly sorry. I love you. I will always love you._

_I hope that you find your happiness,_

_Kahlan_

He stared at her name, his heart in his throat as his mind reread the letter. Her meaning, her words were clear and he couldn't make himself believe that she meant them. At least not all of them. He could never find happiness with anyone else. His heart would be with her and their child for the rest of his life and he would spend every moment of it trying to get her back.

She wanted him to continue the quest, but without her there was no quest. He would tell her that he was doing this for the people, but it had been a lie. He did this for her, for a life with her and if he couldn't have it, he didn't want to continue. But she asked you to, his heart told him, arguing with his mind. He would do this, but not without her.

He looked up in an instant; he felt it clearly, ripping through his body, threatening to tear his flesh from his bones. The release of her magic, he could always feel it, but never like this before. Their child strengthened the ripple and he suddenly knew that it was meant for him to feel. Folding the letter neatly, Richard raced through the trees, screaming for his friends to follow him.

Blood covered parts of the ground, five men laid dead, against trees and over each other. Bending down, he pulled one of Kahlan's daggers from the bloodiest body of them all and looked around. "They're not banelings. Why would they attack her?"

Kicking over one of the bodies, Zedd looked over to his worried grandson. "Not everyone is loyal to the Mother Confessor."

Taking a few steps, Richard stared off trough the trees, straining his eyes to see her. "Kahlan!" The blood trail caught his eye, bringing his heart to a stop as he slowly followed it. The blood had been dragged through, making him wonder if it was her they were dragging. That would be the only way she would go with them, he thought to himself as he reached the end of the trail. Another man lay dead a few feet away, his body barely showing through the grass and bushes.

He could feel someone's eyes on him, watching him carefully from the trees. Turning around, he scanned the area, making sure that he missed nothing. "Kahlan!" He shouted again, praying to the spirits that she could hear him.

He saw her, running full speed in his direction, shocking him as she threw herself onto him and pushed him into the ground, taking the arrow that was meant for him. A loud cry left her lips as her body began to glow. He closed his eyes to the light as her magic ripped through him. Moving off of him quickly, she gasped in horror at what she had done. She had confessed him; everything was destroyed. She jumped at their footsteps before she fell to the ground and her world went black.

Richard opened his eyes slowly, taking a few moments to adjust to the bright sunlight around him. He was surrounded by more bodies; Kahlan had killed more than a dozen before he has awoken. Searching the area for her, he found his heart racing as he skimmed the ground for her. Zedd was tying a large man to a tree while Cara held him still. There was so sign of the woman he loved.

Running his fingers through his hair, he pulled then back and looked at the blood that now stained them. He had been knocked unconscious when she threw him to the ground. The last thing he could remember was the feel of her above him as she took the arrow that was meant for him. He smiled, remembering the way it felt when her magic went through him. As he had thought, it didn't harm him.

"What happened? Where's Kahlan?"

Zedd stood up and frowned, shaking his head as he walked over to his grandson. "She was taken by a few of the men. Once they managed to get the Rada'Han around her neck, she was unable to defend herself against them all."

"Where were you?" Richard shouted as he staggered to his feet. "How could you allow them to take her?"

Grabbing his shoulders, the wizard held him still. "She's confessed you."

"What? No! Zedd, I'm not confessed! Her magic didn't change me! We have to get her back!"

He stared into his grandson's eyes as Cara stepped beside him. "They will kill her within the day; he will be released before nightfall."

"I'm not confessed!" Richard shouted, pushing Cara away from him. "If they kill Kahlan they also kill our child!"

"She touched you with her magic. We both saw it!"

He grabbed his friend's shoulders and shook her. "I am not confessed! I don't know how to explain it, but her magic couldn't make me love her anymore than I always have! Now you can help me rescue her or I will kill you where you stand!"

Zedd pushed between them and looked into his eyes. "Your love for her protected you." He gave him a light smile. "I suspected it would."

"We need to save her!" Looking around him, he tried to see which way they had taken her. His head throbbed, his vision was blurry and his strength was almost completely gone, but he still rushed into the trees, desperate to find her. "Where would they take her?"


	3. Chapter 3

"If you are waiting for The Seeker to come for me, you will be waiting a very long time," Kahlan said coldly as one of the men lifted her dress, his hand sliding over part of her thigh, while another pulled the arrow from her shoulder. "He won't know anything has happened to me until he makes his way to Aydindril." She didn't want them to know that he would come after her; that he would be there sooner than they imagined. As she looked around, she realized that she didn't want him to come.

"He will come. We know how the Seeker feels about you. He will come, try and rescue you and when he does, we will kill you both." Pulling out his knife, he brought it to the side of her face and grinned. "But until then, we will find another use for you. You see, my men and I have been without a decent woman for so long and this metal will keep you from taking us as your slaves." His smile widened, bringing fear to rise up within her. "You are going to make us all very happy."

The man was tall and slender; his hair a light brown with a touch of silver on the sides, giving away his age. His voice made her sick, a rough and cold tone with every word. He wore no colors, giving her no idea to who he worked for or why he wanted to kill Richard. His dark eyes locked on hers as his smile widened.

Cutting the top of her dress, he stared at the tops of her breasts. "I will have you first. My men will enjoy learning how to take a woman."

Lifting her chin, she took in a deep breath. "You have to rape a woman to feel like a man, but know this, you will never be one."

He slapped her, hard; her head fell back against the tree she was tied to. "I will show you how much of a man I am."

She stared him in the eyes as he ripped apart her dress and pulled her boots from her feet. Cutting the corset from her, he called to his men, beckoning them to come and watch. Pulling her from the tree, he pulled apart her legs and moved between them, unlacing his pants quickly with one hand while the other moved over her body. The men gathered around, smiling widely as the Mother Confessor struggled beneath their master.

"When he does come for me, he will kill you."

"Not before I've had my fun." He moaned loudly as he pushed into her, grinning at her as tears filled her eyes. "You feel good." Pumping into her, he looked to a few of his men and laughed. "We have ourselves a good one boys!" He grabbed her breasts in both hands, squeezing as hard as he could and until she screamed in pain.

The men around them all began to unlace their pants as their leader pulled out of her, with a satisfied moan. "Not now boys. We want to make sure she doesn't go bad on us. But you will be mine again this evening." Standing up, he looked to his eager men. "Keep her here, naked. I want everyone to admire our new prisoner. But if any one of you touches her without my consent, I will cut you off. Hoyt, clean her up. Be thorough. Every inch should be cleaned."

The men cheered as he walked away, Kahlan vomited. Hoyt stepped in close to her, lifting her head and turning it so that she wouldn't vomit on herself. "Breathe deeply; it will keep you from spitting anything else out." She looked over at him, memorizing his face. He was young, as young as she and his hair fell to his shoulders as he leaned over her, wiping her chest roughly with a thick cloth. "Stop moving, you will only attract their attention again and if you do, they will rip you apart fighting over who enters you next."

"And what about you?" she questioned, looking around them and watching as most of the men left.

"I do as I am told. If Paul says that I am to have you, do not think that I won't. You are a prize for most of us here. The women we get are slaves, ones that have been had more times than they have eaten, but you... You are nearly pure and you have not been had many times." He grinned, making her even sicker to her stomach. "You should prepare yourself for the worst with each of us. It will help with the pain. Turn, I will clean your side."

"He will not come. It is pointless to hold me."

"If he doesn't. We will use you until we grow tired of you and then we will kill you. We will make sure he knows. The sooner he comes, the sooner this will be over for you."

Blinking free more tears, Kahlan shook her head. "It will not be over until he has finished with me."

"Spread your legs." She looked up at him and then pushed her knees tighter together, trying to move farther away. "Open your legs!" The remaining men turned and looked, watching in laughs as Hoyt pushed her legs apart. "Hold still or I will make you and you will not like it my way." She continued to fight him, not wanting him to touch her anywhere else. She screamed loudly as his fingers pushed into her and her legs were pulled apart by another man. "Hold still or I will hurt you in ways you couldn't imagine."

He left her the moment he finished. She had never felt so dirty before and if she allowed herself to think about what had just happened, it drove her mad. Breathing deeply, she tried to forget the feel of his hands upon her, touching her in a way only Richard and only once had done to her before. A part of her was terrified to think of what would happen when he came for her; the other prayed that he wouldn't. If he stayed away, he would survive and that was all that mattered to her. Anything that was done to her, she would accept if it meant that Richard was still alive and that he was safe.

The men, she hoped, would lose their interest in her once the child grew within her. It would be months before any of them took notice; she knew they would kill her before it went on that long. Looking out at the camp, she tried to fight the tears that collected in her eyes as the men stared at her. There were more now than before and their eyes were dark with lust. Shifting her body, Kahlan pulled her knees up to her chest, doing her best to cover herself and make it harder for them to see any part of her. She had never wanted any man, other than Richard, to look at her this way. She felt sick.

She lost count how many men had touched her. They were all becoming a blur that never seemed to stop or slow. Their voices merged together with the grunts, moans and laughter. They hadn't fed her in days, her stomach growled constantly in begging for food. It had only been half an hour since the last of them left her and she could still feel them upon her. Her body ached and screamed for freedom, but she ignored it all. Richard, her mind told her was coming for her, but she could barely remember what he looked like. She couldn't trust her own thoughts.

"I have good news Confessor," Paul said as he entered her room. She was sitting against the headboard of a small bed, her hands tied above her head, her wrists bleeding from her attempts to free herself. She was still naked, her legs crossed in front of her as a small way to hide herself. "Your Seeker is looking for you." She nearly screamed. She wanted to tell him that he could have her if he left Richard alone, but she couldn't make a sound. She had spent most of the past four days screaming and yelling, hoping that someone somewhere would hear her and come to her rescue. "You're more pleasant this way. Your screams will be missed though." He walked slowly in her direction, pulling open his pants as he came closer. "It won't be the same without you begging for me to stop, but I assure you, I will still enjoy myself."

He devoured her body with his lips, tongue and teeth, enjoying every moment as she wiggled beneath him. Looking up from her stomach, he watched her face cringe as he ran his tongue slowly over her skin. Her screams came out as soft gasps, barely making their way to his ears as he settled between her legs. It was his favorite part. He made sure to be rough, to hurt her with every move. He pushed at her legs, trying to open them wider as he laughed at her pain. His laugh echoed in her ears, unending until he was unable to continue moving and fell on top of her. The weight of him nearly crushed her as he continued to run his hands over her body. "Your Seeker will never know what he has missed." Biting her chest once more, he sat up with a grin. "You will be Hoyt's again today. Enjoy the animal."

As he walked from the room, Kahlan instantly began pulling at her chains again, desperately trying to get loose. She had been taken by Hoyt more times than some of the other men, he she was always able to remember. The things he did to her, the way he would bring her to scream out in a pain she didn't know she could feel as he whispered in her ear about how the Seeker would watch as he took her over and over again. Through the second night, she held her eyes closed and prayed silently to the spirits to keep Richard away. She didn't want him to see her this way, she never wanted him to know what they had done to her.

The thought of being with him again made her heart pound in horror. She wasn't strong enough to have that monster have her in a way she wanted Richard. Moving to her knees, she used all of her body weight against the chain. The pain she felt now would be nothing compared to what she would feel when the other man was done with her. Her blood dripped onto her face as she pulled, moving up instead to bite herself free. She bit through her skin, trying to get loose enough to pull herself free before he came into the room. Her cries were muffled as she continued to work, loosening her hands slowly.

The moment her hands were free, she jumped from the bed and rushed to the tiny window on the right side of the room. When they had brought her in three days ago, she had made note that it was the safest way to escape. Trees would give her some cover as she ran north; no one would be able to see her leave. She only had to run far enough to reach a town, any town and she would be safe. She would need to lead them as far away from Richard as possible, she would go to Aydindril. She was covered in blood as she landed on the other side of the window, her feet hitting the ground with a soft crunch. She froze in fear, praying silently to the spirits that she wasn't heard. The sound of the men's laughter filled the air, flowing in the wind, taunting her as she moved carefully into the trees.

She took off in a dead run, pushing through the trees as fast as she could, jumping over fallen logs and low bushes. Rolling down a small hill, she screamed, suddenly grateful that she had no voice to be heard. Her feet began to bleed from the rocks and sticks, her body aching in pain as she pushed herself onward. She scanned the area quickly, making sure that if she was being followed, she would have a place to hide or to catch her breath. Sliding on her side, she buried herself beneath a large set of fallen trees that were covered by overgrown grass, weeds and moss. She breathed in gasps, waiting a few moments to see if she had been followed.

She could hear footsteps, what sounded to be many sets of them as she pushed her back against the wood. If she didn't act soon, she would be found and they would take her back. Looking around the ground, she grabbed stick and broke it, making the end into a slight point as she inched toward the entrance. Her breaths came in pants, her heart pounding as she came closer; it was all about to end. She jumped out, grabbing the man who stood before her, the stick pressed to the side of his neck. Her chest heaved against his back as she looked around for the others. She saw no one.

"I'm not going to hurt you." His voice scared her, it couldn't be him. He couldn't know where she was. "Kahlan, it's all right."

She pushed him away and threw herself back into the safety of the fallen trees, moving back as far as she could. Her mind had to be playing tricks again; he could not have found her. Staring at the opening, she waited in fear that it had not been him and that it was them again. She wouldn't survive another day with those men. He pushed his head in, frowning at the sight of her. She was sitting on the ground, her knees pressed to her chest, her arms wrapped around them as she shook in fear. His first instinct was to run to her, but he didn't. She was too fragile; one wrong move could send her away from him. He spoke softly, telling her that it was all right, that she was safe and that nothing would ever happen to her again. His eyes roamed over her, taking in as many wounds visible. His heart ached at the vision.

Kneeling down a foot away from her, he leaned forward, looking her in the eyes so that she would know he spoke the truth. "I'm going to get you out of here. Zedd will heal you and then I will keep you safe. No one will hurt you, I promise."

She stared at him in silence, still unsure if he was really there. She opened her mouth to ask, but nothing came out. Her eyes were filled with tears, her body bleeding from more places than he had seen from anyone. He reached out slowly, making sure that she didn't feel threatened by his movement as he grabbed her hand. She remained still for a moment, afraid to leave the place she had found safety, but the look in his eyes pulled her from her fear. Following him from the darkness, she remained close behind him, using his body as a shield.

Once they were outside, he pulled her into his arms, hiding her naked body the best that he could as they moved through the trees. He hated making her move so fast, but he was afraid that whoever had taken her would find them before they reached their friends. Zedd rushed toward them with a blanket as they stumbled into view, stopping in place as Richard held out his hand to keep him away. Sitting Kahlan on the ground, he reached out for the blanket, bringing it around her as she looked at the others. He continued to whisper to her, trying to comfort her as he lifted her wrists for his grandfather to see.

She stared at the others, almost as though she didn't recognize them. Following Richard's lead, she let them move in close, but didn't take her eyes off of them.

"He's going to heal these." She tried to pull her hands back, shaking her head as she inched closer to Richard. "It's all right; you won't feel any more pain. Trust me."

Closing her eyes, she allowed him to lift her wrists back to the wizard. "Spirits, what happened?" he asked as he took her small wrists in his thin hands.

Richard shook his head, "I don't know, but they look like bite marks."

"I..." her voice pushed out past her lips. "I had to... get free..." Her eyes were filled with tears as she pushed her forehead into his shoulder.

He felt sick at the thought. She had chewed through her own wrists in order to get free. Whatever they had done to her, he would make sure they would pay. It took longer than expected for her wrists to heal, but she no longer fought them. After the wrists, Richard was able to help her lie back so that all of her wounds could be healed, the amount of them of almost unbelievable. Bruises, scratches and bite marks covered her chest, stomach, sides and back. Richard began to wonder how she had survived. Her legs were stained, leaving no doubt as to where the blood came from. The moment they touched her legs, she kicked, hard, and crawled out of reach.

"We're not going to hurt you, Kahlan. We just want to make sure that you are all right."

"She won't let you touch her," Cara said as she walked over to her. It surprised Richard and Zedd to see her kneel down beside the Confessor and lay her hand on her shoulder. "She's been raped. No man will touch her will touch her like that."

Standing, Richard stepped over to them and looked into Kahlan's eyes. "Will you let us...? Kahlan, we need to make sure that you're okay, that our child is all right."

"Please, no..."

"I know that this is hard Kahlan, but I need you to trust me. We will not hurt you."

"Fine," she whispered, her body continuing to shake in fear and cold. Squeezing her eyes shut, she relaxed her muscles and waited.

Richard knelt down beside her, resting a hand on her shoulder as a small way to provide a little bit of comfort. He kept his eyes on her face, seeing the tears that leaked free. The sound of Zedd's horrified gasp drew his attention, pulling his eyes from her in time to see his grandfather tear up as he began to heal her. Kahlan whimpered against him, bringing his eyes back to her as Cara gently wiped some of the blood from her mouth.

The moment it was finished, the wizard moved away quickly to deal with the pain he had just seen. He couldn't understand how someone could hurt anyone like that. It filled with an anger he had barely known before and he knew that whoever hurt her would come back. They would not want their toy to be taken away from them. He wondered if they had broken her mind, but looking over his shoulder, he knew they didn't. The way she was comforted by Richard's presence, told him everything.

Pulling her into his arms, Richard watched Zedd, waiting for him to say something. "Is she all right?"

He nodded slowly and turned around, looking at her as she cried silently. "I'm so sorry, child."

Looking her in the eyes, Richard took in a deep breath. "I'm going to make them pay for this."

Quickly, she jumped up and grabbed his shirt, shaking her head as she cried. "No!" She gasped for air, "They... Want you! You... Can't go..."

He was enraged, his heart pounded in fury as he looked into her fearful eyes. Everything they had done to her was to get him. Taking her face in his hands he swore to her. "I will kill them all."


	4. Chapter 4

He watched her carefully, making sure that she was all right. She stared out into the trees, scanning the area for her enemies, unable to keep herself from believing that they were upon them. At times, she would look at him, meeting his eyes with no expression other than the fear. Richard began to wonder if he should move closer to her, sit at her side and ease her into sleep, but he was afraid that it would make her feel worse. Lying down, he tore his eyes off of her and looked up at the night sky. They hadn't spoken anymore and it was driving him mad. He missed the sound of her voice and her laughter. He was beginning to fear that he would never hear them again.

He couldn't stop thinking about the way she looked into the trees; it made him even more uneasy. It was almost as though she knew someone was there, watching, waiting for their chance to strike. Sitting up with a sigh, he stood and walked out into the trees, being sure that she was still in his line of sight. After a few moments, he began to hear movement and drew his sword as he stepped carefully towards the noise. Looking back to Kahlan, he gave her a small nod to let her know that everything was fine, but from the look on her face, he knew that she didn't believe him. She sat up and stared out at him, waiting for something to happen; fearing that it would. Crawling closer to the fire, she leaned forward, straining her eyes to see in the darkness. Someone was out there.

Richard was thrown to the ground; seven men circled him with swords as he fought to get back to her. There were too many of them, they stood no chance. Cara shouted for her to remain still as she rushed off into the opposite direction toward the other men who came out of the darkness. Zedd burned the men that came toward him, taking out three or four men at once, Kahlan couldn't be sure of the exact number. They were surrounded and they wanted one thing. They wanted to kill Richard. She wouldn't allow it to happen.

Standing up, she ran into the trees throwing herself onto one of the men who meant to attack Richard. In a furious rage, Kahlan began beating him with her fists, pounding down upon his face until his body stopped moving beneath her. In an instant, she moved on to the next, taking him down and repeating her actions, wishing that she had some kind of weapon. Her wish was granted as she landed upon the third, pulling his knife from his hand and pushing it quickly into his neck, silencing his scream. The moment she saw him, she lost control. Hoyt stood a few feet from her, his sword raised as he ran towards the man she loved. He was seconds away from ending the Seeker's life when she threw herself in front of him with an unearthly scream.

Richard turned at the sound, instantly rushing to her side, but was stopped quickly as more men came before him. Hoyt's sword cut through her side, but she made no cry of pain. Her eyes were black, her face deadly calm as they danced in battle. Throwing her against a tree, he lifted the thin dress she wore, reminding her of their time together. With all of her strength, she pushed them to the ground and crawled on top of him. Her fists pounded into him, his face, throat, chest and shoulders, hitting anywhere that she could. His blood splattered onto her face as she cried out once more, scaring the life out of the other men. As Richard pushed his sword through the last man visible, he spun around to find her.

She was still sitting over the man, a rock in her hands as she slammed it down upon his face. From the waist up, he body was covered in blood, the man's face unrecognizable. He waited for her to stop, for her to realize that he was dead, but she didn't and then he realized who had brought her the most pain. The edges of the rock began to cut into her hands as it became heavier and heavier; she couldn't bring herself to stop. Tears flowed down her cheeks, rinsing the blood that was beginning to stain her face as she cried. Wrapping his arms around her, Richard pulled her from the man's body, struggling against her as she kicked out her legs and tried to continue with her revenge.

Turning her around, he pulled her against him in a hug. Lowering them to their knees, Richard tightened his hold on her, whispering that the man who had hurt her was dead. She clung to his shirt in sobs as he rocked her gently keeping her mind busy as Zedd healed her fresh wounds. He stared over to the body and he couldn't help but feel glad that she had a small amount of justice. After a few moments, her tears began to fade, feeling completely safe in his arms. Turning slowly, she looked over at Hoyt and in a split second, she leaned over and puked once again, the sight making her remember every moment she had spent with him.

Holding back her hair, Richard leaned over, wiping her mouth with the sleeve of his shirt as she looked up at him. He almost didn't recognize her with the blood covering her face, but it made her eyes stand out all the more, bringing her back to him. Blinking the tears loose, she reached up and grabbed his face and pulled him to her, pressing her forehead against his as she took a moment to tank the spirits that he was still alive. Dropping back to the ground, she crawled over to Hoyt's body and reached into his clothes. It was clear that she was looking for something, but he couldn't figure out what it was. Just as he made his way over, she pulled her hands free of him with a small smile.

In her hand, she held the key to the Rada'Han around her neck, the key to herself. She unlocked herself quickly, throwing the metal down onto the ground as though it burned her. For the first time, she noticed that both Cara and Zedd were watching her, waiting for something. "There were more."

"What?" Richard asked her as she looked at him.

"There were more men. They will be coming soon."

"Not if I get to them first."

She grabbed his shirt and held it firmly, staring him in the eyes so that he understood what she was about to say. "If you go, they will kill you."

Taking her face in his hands, Richard sighed. "Kahlan, if they hadn't hurt you, I would stay here. I would let it go, but they- What they did to you... They deserve to pay and as long as they are out there, they could come for you. They could hurt you again and I can't live with that. I am going to kill every last one of them."

Shaking her head, she pulled back. "You can't. They only wanted you and if you walk in there- If they kill you, I-"

"They won't."

She knew this was an argument that she wasn't going to win, the way he looked at her, as though he still saw her the way he had found her the day before. "Then I am going with you."

"No," he stated instantly. He didn't want her anywhere near those men. "You shouldn't be there. If anything happened to you-"

"I'm not going to let you go without me." Laying her hand on her stomach, she lifted her head and swallowed. "She'll protect me."

He was surprised by the amount of men still at the camp. He had been almost certain that they had sent most of them after Kahlan. It made his sick to think that they had all raped her. There were so many of them and his rage called for their deaths. They moved with stealth, killing them quietly as they moved through their tents. Kahlan remained at his side, taking an extra moment after each kill for closure. He began to see more and more of the woman he loved with each death; he would never know how she was able to be so strong.

The silence ended suddenly, screams of battle filled the air as men raced toward them. She remained at his side, letting him know where she was and that she was ready for those coming toward them. He saw her out of the corner of his eye, she moved with grace, swiftly ridding them of the men that meant to kill them. It was over so quickly and it was then that he realized that it was she, who had killed most of them.

"You have returned with a present." Kahlan jumped at the sound of his voice, moving closer to Richard as Paul stepped out of the house she had been staying in. "I knew you wouldn't be able to stay away. You enjoyed having us all make love to you."

"You rapped her!" Richard shouted angrily as Kahlan grabbed his arm.

"I played with my toy. It was a worthwhile way to wait for you to arrive." He grinned widely. "You don't know what you are missing. The feel of her, ahhh... Of course you could feel her, but you seem to have lost the only way."

Kahlan watched as his knuckles turned white as his hold on the sword tightened. "She was not your toy!"

Paul laughed and stepped closer, running his eyes over her body. "She is my toy and after you are dead, she will be once again. Look at her, she wants it. She wants someone's hands to touch her, someone's tongue tasting her. Her breasts, they're my favorite. The way she scream when I would get carried away. You will never know how amazing her body is."

"You will never touch her again," he hissed loudly, shifting his body to prepare for a run. "You will never hurt her again!"

Kahlan nearly fell to the ground as he ran forward, leaping at the final man. Paul's small blade cut through Richard's chest; making her scream as though it cut through her skin. She fell through the ground as the Sword of Truth rang through the air before at last removing Paul's head. Zedd rushed to her side, helping her to her feet as she reached out for Richard. It was over. He had killed them all as he promised. She was safe, for now.

Stumbling to her, he reached into his shirt and pulled out the letter she had written him. "Now, about this..." He fell into her arms with a small smile. "I'm not letting you go."

Moving to the ground, she held him to her as Zedd healed him, her fingers combing through his hair as he tightened his hold on her. "All right." His eyes began to fall closed, his hands gripping her tightly in fear that she wouldn't be there when he awoke.

Months had passed since she was rescued, but she still flinched every time someone came close to her. He stared at her, watching as she pulled the blanket up to her chin. Each night was colder and he was afraid that if it got any colder, she wouldn't be able to stand it. The thin gown she wore, Zedd had made for her when her own clothes failed to fit her any longer was far from keeping her warm. "Are you warm enough?"

"Yes," she lied, forcing her teeth to stop chattering long enough to answer.

He saw through her lie instantly, but he didn't question her answer. He wanted to pull her into his arms and hold her, but he knew that it wouldn't be right. "I'll gather some more wood."

"If you go out there, you'll freeze to death before you can gather anything."

He smiled, "If I don't, you'll freeze here quietly."

Turning her head toward him, Kahlan smiled back at him, the happiness on her face surprising him. Crawling over to him, she laid herself down beside him and sighed. "You can make sure I don't freeze in my sleep."

Wrapping an arm around her, Richard grinned widely as she rolled to face him, her right hand running across his chest before coming to his face. "Are you sure this is all right? I don't want to hurt or upset you."

"I'm sure." Releasing a soft sigh, she pressed her forehead to his chest. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"The past months. I- I know how much it hurt you. I can see it in your eyes, but you- You've never said anything."

Tightening his arms around her, Richard sighed. "You've been hurting, that's what hurts me. Kahlan, you get up every morning and I see you force the smile on your face. I hear you whimper in your sleep, but when you wake up, you- You push down your pain and I hate that you have to. Every day, I want to make you feel better. I want to comfort you, but I can't. If I pulled you into my arms, I may upset you even more and I- If me holding you upset you, I-"

She fisted his shirt in her hands, "I'm sorry."

Pushing her onto her back, he looked down at her. "No. Kahlan, you shouldn't be sorry. You haven't done anything wrong."

"I feel like I have. I feel like I hurt you and I don't know how to fix it." Leaning back to look at him, she sighed. "I've been thinking about it. A lot." She let out a soft laugh, looking up to the sky. "What happened to me and some of the things you said before, when we- I... I didn't fully understand what you meant before, but after they... I realized that you were right."

"Kahlan, they raped you. They hurt you, they ripped you apart!" He didn't mean to raise his voice, but the thoughts were too much for him to remain calm.

"I know, but I couldn't help but think about it. The look in your eyes, when we were together and the warmth that I felt from you and I- I remember sitting in that room, staring at the darkness and then suddenly feeling..." Looking over to him, she gave him a small smile. "I felt so stupid that I hadn't seen it before and then when I was back, I- I wanted to say something, but I couldn't. I didn't know how."

"I didn't think that you would think about that. Not after-"

Her smile faded for a moment and then returned. "It surprised me too, but I couldn't stop. I was just so grateful that I-" She looked away, embarrassed. "I was grateful that I got to be with you first."

He kissed her tenderly for a few moments until he realized what he was doing and pulled back. He feared that he had done the wrong thing. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

She hated that he felt bad for kissing her, when it was all she wanted him to do. Resting her right hand against his cheek, Kahlan lifted her face to his and reconnected their lips. Their kiss was soft and slow at first, but heated quickly as she pulled him close to her. It was a relief, since she returned; she had often wondered how it would feel to have his lips against hers again. She almost forgot that they weren't alone, that Cara and Zedd could wake up at any moment and see, but she didn't care. It had been so long since she had felt this way; she didn't care if the spirits themselves were to appear before them.

He kept his hands still, not wanting to risk her pulling away from his touch. Breaking their kiss, Kahlan moved against him and released a soft sigh of content. "I've been thinking," he said softly, rolling onto his back and taking her with him. "What are we going to name her?"

"You've been thinking about that?"

"I have been thinking of names for our children for some time now." He wanted to tell her that he had been thinking about names for their children long before she became pregnant, but he didn't.

Lifting herself up onto her elbow, she grinned down at him. "What have you been thinking?"

He laughed, slightly embarrassed to say anything. "Well, I... I first thought it would be nice to name her after myself. You know, a good strong name that she could be humiliated by." Her laugh took away all of his fear, it was a beautiful sound, bringing him to share honestly. "I thought about Piper, Emily, Jennifer, Madison, Catherine... I've thought about it for a while."

Smiling widely, she rested her arm over his chest and laid her chin down upon it. "They're beautiful names. Which is your favorite?"

"I don't know. None of them seem worthy."

"You thought of them; that makes them very worthy," she said softly. "I like Piper."

"I thought you might. It was the name of the cat you and Dennee had as children."

"I can't believe you remember that."

He laughed softly, drawling her even closer. "Of course I remember. You said that she was one of your happiest memories."

"She is, but maybe we shouldn't name our daughter after a cat. Madison?"

He grinned up at her, "Sounds perfect."

She laid her head down on his chest and listened to the thump, thump, tha-dump of his heart. "Do you think that she will be happy?"

"I have no doubt that she will. With you as her mother, she will be very happy."

Lifting her head to look at him, she smiled a small smile. "Thank you." She moved out of his arms, lying on her back as she began to rub her hands over her belly. "Do you hear that Madison? You're going to be happy." Glancing over to Richard, she let out a soft laugh. "You father is going to spoil you."

Resting his hand over hers, he nodded. "I sure hope so."


	5. Chapter 5

"If I get any larger, I won't fit through the trees," Kahlan said frustrated. She had wanted to go back to Aydindril, but the compass lead them farther away each day and Richard refused to let her out of his sight. The only time she hadn't felt useless or a burden was when they were fighting. She had somehow been able to use Madison's powers as though they were her own. It was a thrill to it all, learning about their child as the days passed. "It's almost time and I don't think that I should... I can barely keep up with you now and the day is nearly here."

"There's a town up the road, we can be there in a few hours. You can give birth in a quiet Inn; I'll keep you safe and comfortable."

"You can't stop searching for the stone." Her body ached in ways she didn't think was possible. Every time she moved, she was hit with a piercing pain that flowed through her and it was becoming almost impossible to hide it from him.

Grabbing her hands, he smiled. "This is too important for any of us to miss. Kahlan, you're going to give birth to our child. I'm not going to leave you somewhere to do it alone."

"I won't be alone. There will be someone there who will look out for me."

"Not like I can. Kahlan, I'm not going to leave you. The stone can wait a few days for me to be there with the woman I love while she gives birth to my child."

She wanted to tell him that the world couldn't wait, that he had wasted enough time when he came for her, but she couldn't. Through these past eight months, if he hadn't been with her, she doubted that she would still be alive. As the child grew within her, she had never seen him so happy and it brought out the happiness that seemed to get buried inside of her. She didn't want to take it away from him. "All right." From the look on his face, she knew that he wouldn't take no for an answer. "We should get moving."

"Are you sure you are ready? You haven't rested for very long. I know that you've been in pain." There it was. He knew the entire time that she had been in pain; it was why he suggested the break. It hadn't been because he wanted to gather something to eat.

Forcing a smile, she nodded and began to walk away slowly. "I'm fine."

"No, you're not. Kahlan, you can barely stand and you're trying to walk." He walked closely behind her, ready to catch her when she was unable to pretend any longer. "Please, just sit down for a few minutes."

Turning around to face him, she frowned. "If I sit down, I won't be able to get up again."

Closing the small distance between them, he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and urged her toward the blanket he had laid out on the ground a few minutes before. "I'll help you."

"Richard please, let's keep going. We can make it there in a few hours."

"Five minutes?" She froze, grabbing his arm and pulling him to a stop as well. "What's wrong?"

"I don't think I have five minutes. I think- Richard, she's coming."

Within moments, he was calling for the wizard as she doubled over in pain. He leaned her back against his chest as Cara and Zedd came from the trees. Cara dropped the rabbits she had caught and rushed over, concerned. "Can you carry her? We should get her into town."

"We don't have time." Kahlan said. Her teeth gritted together as she tightened her hold on Richard's hand.

Kneeling at her feet, Zedd looked at the Mord'Sith, who stared at him blankly. "If we move her, it may bring harm to the child. There's a small creek through there, get us some water please." She rushed off through the trees, seeming to be glad to leave. "How long have you been feeling this?"

"A few hours."

"Why didn't you say something?" he asked her with a heavy sigh.

Squeezing her eyes shut, she took in a deep breath and released it slowly; trying to once again, mask her pain. "I didn't want to slow everyone down any more than I already have."

Wrapping an arm around her, Richard pulled her closer to him and pushed the side of his face against her head, trying to comfort her. "You didn't slow us down." Her response was drowned out by her cry of pain, mixed with a small grunt from him as she squeezed his hand. "Zedd, how long?"

The wizard nearly laughed at his question. "There is no way to know. It's all up to Kahlan and the child."

Once Cara had returned, she stayed beside Zedd, waiting for him to ask her to do something. The sun grew warmer as Kahlan's cries grew louder and more persistent. Richard could hear his heart pounding in his ears with each passing moment as time began to slow. The thought of meeting their daughter was filling him with excitement. He leaned around her, hoping for a glimpse of their child as a smile came to his grandfather's lips.

"Just a few more, Kahlan. She's almost here." Zedd tried to keep his voice calm, but each one of them could hear the excitement; the joy in the wizard's voice.

Nearly half an hour later, the sound of a baby's cry echoed through the trees. Kahlan cried out in triumph and relief as the wizard gently wrapped his granddaughter in a warm blanket. The smile on Richard's face was seen from miles away, spreading from ear to ear and showing nearly all of his teeth. Tears filled her eyes as she took her daughter into her arms and nestle her against her chest. Madison stared up at her, eyes wide for a few moments, knowing it was her mother who stared lovingly back at her. She had dark hair, thick, like her mother's surprising them all by the amount that covered her small head. She could hardly believe that their daughter was there; that she even existed at all. The one thing she had come to want more than anything was laying in her arms.

Turning her head toward Richard, Kahlan lifted her arms. "Do you want to hold her?"

"Are you sure? You haven't held her for very long."

Her smile widened, "I've held her for months."

Cara leaned forward, watching as Richard took his daughter into his arms. She had never seen him so happy and as she watched him pull his daughter close, she realized that this was all he would ever need. She stood up as Zedd walked away, giving the new parents a moment alone while he set up their camp. Starting a fire, the Mord'Sith looked back to them, both cooing over their daughter quietly as though nothing or no one else existed.

Opening her eyes, she squinted against the rising sun and smiled. Richard was holding their daughter as he did a slight dance to keep her quiet as he let her sleep. She watched them for a few moments, closing her eyes each time he looked over to her. It wasn't long until she was able to hear him talking, softly telling their daughter that she was beautiful and that she would have anything that she could ever want. He seemed so happy; she didn't want to look away. Sitting up, Kahlan leaned back against a tree, making sure that the blankets were wrapped tightly around her. Her movement caught his attention as he turned around with an embarrassed smile.

"You're mother is awake," he whispered to the small baby in his arms, hoping that Kahlan wouldn't mention what she had seen him doing. Moving quickly, Richard sat down beside her, laying their daughter carefully into her arms. "Kahlan, I've wanted to talk to you about something. Before everything that happened, when you saved me in the forest. You were lying on top of me and you released your magic." He spoke faster than he intended, but he didn't want to give her a chance to stop him.

She looked at him, her heart holding still as she replayed the moment in her mind. She tried to hold it in, to keep from destroying the one person she cared about, but it had been too strong. "I- I didn't want to. I tried to stop it, I- I, but when I saw you- I saw you after and you- You weren't confessed."

"I know, but you... Kahlan, you released your magic into me. I felt it."

"Maybe she protected you, like she did with her other magic. She knew you were there and-"

Shaking his head he smiled, "Kahlan, I don't think that she did. I felt it enter me. I felt it run through my veins, I still feel it."

"Then how are you- How can you be you?"

"I don't know. I thought that maybe you would know. Did it feel any different?"

She looked away, focusing her attention on their daughter for a moment. "Yes. I'd never felt anything like it before. It was almost as though..." She bought her eyes to his, needing to see his reaction when she told him, needing to know the truth. "It was almost as though you called it into you." He stared at her. He felt naked before her, knowing that it was the truth. She knew that he wanted her magic to flow through him and in that moment in the forest, he prayed for her let it go. He wanted to be hers and hers alone. Forever. "Why?"

He licked his lips quickly and looked away, watching as a set of brown leaves blew past their legs. "At first I thought it would keep you with me, but then, just as you landed on top of me, I- I just wanted you to help me to love you more. I thought that if I could love you more then maybe one day it would be enough for me to ask you to love me back."

"I do love you, Richard."

"I know, but... After I read your letter, after learning that you had left me, I- I was so afraid that if I didn't get you back, by the time I found the stone and returned to you, you wouldn't feel the same way about me. Then when your magic was released, I knew that you would always love me. I could feel it."

She looked down to their child, resting soundly in her arms for a moment and then back to him. "What does this mean?"

He grinned widely. He grinned like he had when they made love, it comforted her. "It means that we can have more children, that is, if you want them."

She stared at him a few moments, waiting to wake up, to find fault with his answer, but neither came. "What if you're wrong?"

"Then I will be confessed and still spend the rest of my life loving you, but I'm not wrong," he stated with a smile. "If you wanted, we could give Madison several sisters."

Kahlan leaned up and kissed him, suddenly wishing that she wasn't holding their daughter and was able to touch him. She needed to touch him. He must have heard her thoughts, because he moved around her, never breaking their kiss as he sat on his knees above hers. He had her face in his hands in seconds, making her for a brief moment forget her own name as he leaned into her. The sudden movement of Madison between caused them to pull apart, both looking to see if they had woken her before letting out a light laugh. Sitting down once again, Richard wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her to him, hoping to keep them all warm as he pulled up the blankets.

"It's about time." Both turned to look at her as Cara sat up on her bedroll. "I'll get more wood."

Zedd, already sitting up, beamed at the couple across the dying flicker of the fire. "I was beginning to wonder if you two would figure it out. Now, you can both have the life you've wanted with each other."

Surprised, Kahlan leaned forward slightly, meeting her friend's eyes. "Are you saying that it's true? That Richard and I can be together?"

"Yes. Your love for each other is stronger than anything I have ever seen before. It is more powerful than your magic and because he was willing to be yours, even confessed, your magic found nothing to take from him."

She wanted to kiss him again, to tell him how much she loved him, but now that she knew Zedd and Cara were awake, she couldn't do it. "Did you know that it was possible?"

The wizard laughed, "I'm a wizard of the First Order, of course I knew," he said, pretending to be offended by her question. Noticing the look on both of their faces, he smiled and stood. "I believe I hear Cara calling for my help. Here," he reached down and took Madison from her mother's arms. "I'll take my granddaughter for a walk."

Watching Zedd enter the trees with Madison, Kahlan leaned even closer to Richard. "We have a daughter."

"I can barely believe it either. Even as I held her in my arms, I kept expecting to wake up from a dream."

Laughing, she turned herself into him. "I gave birth to her and I keep expecting to wake up. She doesn't seem real."

Resting his chin on the top of her head, Richard sighed. "I've wanted her for so long and I always thought that someday we would find a way, but... Kahlan, we have a daughter and it's not someday, it's now."

Bringing her hand up to his chest, she ran one of her fingers along the skin in the small opening of his shirt. "I didn't think that it was possible." She wished that she hadn't given birth the day before; she wanted to be with him, to make love until they could no longer move, but she couldn't. Not yet, but she couldn't wait for the moment she could.

******THE END******


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